November 27, 1861, I'm back from battle, and I am finally finding time to write in this little journal of mine. I never thought it would be so difficult, truly, I thought that the Union would be better than this. Our battle with the South at Bull Run river, was very discouraging. My regiment needs a leader who is fearless and can show that he can stand proud in the face of terror, and instead I was cowardly and ran like a little schoolgirl, most of our ranks did. It pains me to admit, but I am scared, I fear for my life, and I fear that the war won't be as easy as we'd thought. The past few moths I've been refining my skills, learning how to properly shoot a bayonet and such. We even received new items, finer boots, more bayonets, and slightly better food. I heard it was all because of an income tax that was set up by Congress , letting us get that fine new material. Speaking of, we have a new General, General McClellan. He is quite young for his position, but...